Monday, March 9, 2009

Good Bye

As an army brat I grew up all my life moving from one place to another. Hence leaving behind relationships and friends as we went along. It wasn’t easy leaving friends behind but it wasn’t earth shattering either. We moved along and friends came and went. Some relationships really stuck and have seen many postings and years. Some just withered away with time. We moved on as defence personnel’s family and so did relationships. Time and we didn't stop for anyone.

Today it’s a different story. It is so difficult to say good-bye, even if the relationship or friendship is harmful for self. Its like your left brain and right brain are just not connecting. Your heart has malfunctioned. It’s not responding to emotions. You are sticking on to things that are toxic and rotting.

Friends who haven’t got the strength anymore to take you for who you are, weak partners, pretentious relatives, jaded colleagues, boring jobs, people who are not strong enough to stand by you. Then why am I not able to get out of this toxic situation? It’s not just me thats in this quandary. The more I look around the more I see the same with the world around me. We just want destiny to make those hard calls for us. We are on bended knees taking the weight of useless meaningless relationships, routines, jobs, people...

Aren’t our choices supposed to add that extra zing in our lives…then why is it weighing us down? Do we weave such tangled webs around us that the very webs that were to be our safety nets, become our emotional deathbeds?!

A seed for thought for the emotionally parched?!

10 comments:

A Beautiful Dream said...

I think sometimes we expect perfection from all around but everything can not be just perfect as we expect. same from others also, people around us expect us to live according to their expectation which steals our liberty, our independent thoughts and so we feel weight of mountain on our head which is useless.

SePuLcHeR said...

well said lady......yeah its kinda true.....we build these webs around us.....or like i put it...we capture our self in our self made prisons!

we never realise in the process of ensuring our safety, warmth and love within.....we get so tied down....that when we need to move outta it...or maybe even just see beyond...its so hard to....so very hard to.

love the way u have ended it!! hats off to u :)

Small Miracle said...

A beautiful dream, very well put about stealing the liberty...its like loss of soul.

Thanks a billion Sepulcher. Ur comments always make me think. Our view point of life is different thus intriguing.

Mandeo said...

i got alot to say after reading this .. but am so connected that i can jus talk to myself ..

I Wear It Like A Tattoo said...

i do agree about the safety nets we create..ultimately we forget how to let our guard down and get constricted when it comes to emotions or even taking risks when it comes to emotional availability..be it a relationship with a lover, spouse, sibling, best friend etc..

i do believe we shuld all try and open up and learn to enjoy the turbulence of relationships..they wuldnt be any fun otherwise...atleast we end up learning more about each other as well ourselves...inadvertently we end up having journeys in life..otherwise whats a journey if we dont make mistakes or go wrong

i like this post a lot..
i will read it a lot in the future..i relate :)

Small Miracle said...

tattoo boy, making mistakes is not the problem...accepting mistakes is not the problem...knowingly sticking to mistakes that make us unhappy IS the problem.

Small Miracle said...

Talk to me Mandeo. I wanna hear wot u have to say!

Mandeo said...

Hey small miracle..
if someone has to look life the happiest way.. its gotta be u .. isnt it .. thats wat it says ..in ur profile.." a miracle".. u kno it, u say it.. can i plz borrow ur thoughts and fingers to type for a while and read life ur way..

. v got one to live for..
Life is little about wat happens to us and mostly about wat v do about it.

GOODBYE
can be a harsh word .. can be hope.. can lead to never again .. can lead to soon .. its wat situations make of it..
ever thought wen r fathers went to war, said goodbye to r mothers .. did the families give up hopes. no.. their hopes were strong and got stronger .. its the way u say the word" goodbye" the way u say it reveals wat it means.. on the other hand u can imagine a million situations where goodbye means .. bye for good and ever.. these are just words .. its great writers like u who give it strength and wen these words go overboard with their power , its thoughtful writers like u who put them back at their place.. u have the power of words its how u use it. "goodbye" is one of them:)

Small Miracle said...

Its funny, juss last night i was with a friend and was tellin her about how in the army "goodbye" is "i will be back soon". Yep we rallied on as a family as our fathers were on the front.

I think when a loved one says good bye for good, its a tough word to hear. When you want to be set free then its liberating. I guess as you have rightly pointed out...it holds different meanings.

Very interesting prespective you have introduced in this thought process.

Mandeo said...

Appreciated ...!!
Its a honour to be writing comments to a post written by someone who can gently tell wat life is all about..